In my 24 plus years of life I have seen lots of really bad things. I’ve witnessed things most people wouldn’t dream of and I’ve seen things nobody wants to speak of.

However, there is nothing I have ever witnessed that could possibly have prepared me for what I observed in Sao Paulo, Brazil on February 16, 2009.

We arrived at CENA after a bus ride, a train ride, and a hike of about three or four blocks. A very kind man named Joao showed us around and told us to make ourselves at home.

We asked if it would be ok for the three of us to walk around the streets later. Joao laughed and said no. He said if we wanted to go see the streets he would take us.

I was excited as street ministry has always been my passion. As we turned down the first street, I realized this would be unlike any street ministry I had ever experienced.

There were probably 50-75 men, women and children all sitting along the sides of the streets. Many were smoking crack pipes. The numbers were astonishing.

I smiled as Joao grabbed and hugged people. He has built relationships with many of them and is showing them God’s heart.

Then we met a small boy. As soon as he approached us I saw the crack addiction in his eyes and it was all I could do to fight back the tears in mine. I asked Joao how old the boy was. “Thirteen,” he said. There are no words to express the pain I felt seeing a thirteen year old boy trapped in the horror that is addiction to crack cocaine.

But this was only the beginning of our journey. As we were walking to the next street I overheard Joao telling Andy, “this street has not so many people but the next street has a lot.” I wondered how this could be possible.

We turned a corner and I was completely speechless. There were maybe 200 people walking around, smoking crack, selling their bodies, and doing who knows what else.

By this time I had drifted into my own little world, thinking what seemed like a million thoughts per second. Who supplies the drugs out here? How does a 13 year old get addicted to crack? What could we possibly do to make a difference in this place?

As these thoughts raced through my head I guess I stopped paying attention to my surroundings because before I knew it someone grabbed my arm pulling me from the middle of the street as a police car pulled up.

The SUV stopped in the middle of the road and four officers jumped out wielding guns and pointing them in our direction and yelling in Portuguese. Now, I don’t speak Portuguese, but I’ve been around the block enough to know when a cop points a gun at you, you put your hands on the wall and spread your legs.

As I walked to the wall with my friends and about five of the street people, I looked around and noticed the street once filled with a couple hundred people was now basically empty.

Our friend Joao was able to explain to the police that we were missionaries and after they thoroughly examined our passports, they joked with Joao a bit and then let us go.

I’ve seen police bust into places with their guns drawn before, I’ve had them stick their guns in my face before. But there was something about the militant nature of these police officers which struck me.

As the night rolled by I noticed other police SUV’s going down the street. All of them had four police officers in them and they would be hanging out of the window with their guns drawn and finger on the trigger. I was way out of my league on these streets.

The third street we went down was the most troubling of all. When we first turned down it I saw about five kids playing soccer together. I immediately saw another mass of street people about 50 yards beyond them. There seemed to be more kids on this street.

I saw many children under the age of 16 walking around with crack pipes in their hands. It was the children that got to me the most. I’ve been around many crack addicts in my life, but I don’t believe I’ve ever met one under the age of 16. Tonight I saw many.

As we walked back to our home for the next couple days I continued to wrestle with the thought of what we could do to make a difference. I feel God told me that part of my responsibility is to make sure people know about what goes on here; to make people aware that there are children smoking crack on the streets of Sao Paulo, Brazil.

For the more immediate time frame, however, I believe our best “ministry” will be to encourage those who are here on a day to day basis and to do whatever we can to serve them.

Also as I pondered the question of how we could make an impact, I was moved by the impact Joao has made on me. Walking down streets filled with evil, he glowed with a joy that only Christ can give. He wore a smile that told these people there is hope. He hugged prostitutes and kissed addicts on the cheek.

I pray I can demonstrate that kind of love to the people I encounter. Perhaps we all could learn a lesson from Joao.

No matter how dark the alley we walk through, Jesus is the light of the world. If we bring Him, we can brighten up any situation.

I am originally from Gulf Shores, Alabama. I entered a program called Youth-Reach Houston as a resident in July of 2003. At that time I was a gang member and a drug addict. At Youth-Reach I encountered God's grace and love for me for the first time. I burned my rag which was a symbol of my status in the gang on the basketball court at Youth-Reach. From that moment on it was as if God took complete control. I had always wanted to be a famous rapper but God showed me that He had bigger plans for my life and began to give me a heart for the "throwaways" of society.

People like me.

God gets every bit of the glory because I know that there's not even a slight possibility that I could have turned things around on my own. God took a kid with no motivation for anything other than rapping and doing drugs, and he changed my views on life, gave me a new life and purpose, and used everything the enemy meant for evil for His good.

I graduated from the Youth-Reach program in August of 2004 and wanted to get further ministry training. I went to a discipleship school called Master's Commission. There are many Master's Commissions around the world, but I went to one in Lafayette, Louisiana.

Master's Commission is an intensive program which trains you in many areas of ministry, but focuses on two main points: servanthood and relationships. The foundation that was laid for me at Youth-Reach Houston was built on at Master's and at the end of my schooling there I felt led to return to Youth-Reach...this time as a counselor.

I served at Youth-Reach Houston for just over three years and I still feel blessed to have been a part of so many young mens lives.

Now, with Young Hope, I am still able to be a part of the lives of the residents at Youth-Reach, while also being able to serve in several other areas of ministry. I still have a passion for the "throwaways" of society and I know that in some form or fashion the rest of my life will be devoted to helping them. However, the shape and way that is done changes all the time and I believe this is simply the next step in learning to help "the least of these" as Jesus said. I am focused on following God wherever He leads me and bringing His love into whatever situation He puts me in.

Hope. One of the most powerful words in the English language. When you have nothing and the deck is stacked against you, hope will get you through. In times in my life when I should have died, hope kept me alive. Soldiers facing death in POW camps have said hope sustained them.  

When I was lost in a world of drug addiction and gang ties that seemed unbreakable, I clung to a small strand of hope.  It enabled me to step out of the struggle that aimed to take my life.  

If you have hope, no matter how small, you can survive anything. Why is that? 

I once heard someone say the eyes are the windows to the soul. If you look deep into someone’s eyes you can see what lies within them. I believe that to be true. When I’m talking to men and women who are homeless and / or struggling with addiction, I look into their eyes. I’m searching for hope, for that fight that can pull a person out of any struggle.  

I met a man last night whose story almost made me break down. He’s been on dialysis for over ten years, now his sickness is so bad that sometimes he gets dizzy and falls down. He’s broken his hip, his collarbone and his wrist all in the last six months. He’s had two knee replacements. He’s found himself homeless and addicted to crack cocaine over the last year. If anyone has a reason to lose hope it’s this man.  

Yet when I looked into his eyes I saw a warrior, a man that refuses to believe this is the last chapter in his life story. He told me he knows God can set him free. He wants to go to a program but he has dialysis three times a week and no rehab is willing to take him to his dialysis.

I can’t comprehend this man’s courage.  Drugs, sickness and the streets have tried to weaken his resolve, destroy his faith, end his life, but he won’t give up. His hope is in his creator. If that’s where we put our hope, there is no obstacle we cannot conquer. 

What is your hope in? I often find myself putting my hope in my survival skills. Even though I’ve learned over the last five years that God is the only one who can rescue me, I still seem to trust in myself when things get difficult. How crazy is that? 

I know when I choose to trust in myself I just end up getting really stressed out. Yet there’s something inside of me that always tries to look to myself instead of God. Why?  

I think it’s based in fear. Fear that if my hope and trust are placed squarely in a God I can’t see that I will be abandoned. But that is a lie. Every time I place my faith in Christ, He comes through. Every time I place it in myself, my situation gets worse.

So I struggle and strain, I fight and fuss, and sometimes I think God is sitting there on the throne with His arm outstretched, just waiting on me to realize how foolish I’m being. Will I ever learn? I hope so, because life would sure make a lot more sense if I could learn to rely on God completely.

It was in the darkest moment of my life that I learned of God’s power. It was the moment when I wanted to end my own life. I had lost all faith in my own abilities because they had failed me time and time again in my 19 years of life. So with the microscopic amount of hope buried deep within my soul, I cried out to God. I told Him He could have this life if He wanted it, because I didn’t want it anymore.

It was at that point that my whole life changed. The first moment in my life when I put hope in God, and hope has grown in my heart ever since.

Sometimes, like Peter walking on the water, I get distracted by the storm and I start to sink. But thankfully, Christ is always there to pull me up. I’ve found that He IS hope. So now I realize when I look into an addict’s eyes and see hope, I’m actually seeing God’s father heart drawing them. I’m seeing Christ at work within them.

There is no true hope apart from Christ. Everything else fades away. Nothing else will survive the storms of life. Christ is at work within every person. That’s how intensely He loves us. He desires freedom for us through relationship with us.

No one is hopeless, no matter how bleak the situation may seem. Please pray for my friend as he still lives on the streets of Houston. Pray that the hope within him will blossom into the new life he desires. I believe it will. It’s only a matter of time.

This week I met with a very close friend who is involved in full time ministry. Every time I asked him how he was doing he referred to times he was able to minister to other people.

I believe those of us in ministry often judge how we are doing based on how our ministry is going. How much fruit is there in what I’m doing? Are people coming to Christ? Is God speaking through me? But do these questions actually have anything to do with how we are doing as people?

A person can be leading a great move of God and still be dying on the inside. Too often, ministers get in the habit of constantly pouring out and either don’t take the time to receive or don’t have anyone willing to invest in them.

I know God wants us to do our part to help people. To, “bring heaven to earth,” but I don’t believe he wants this to come at the cost of His relationship with us. We serve a God who is first and foremost relational.

He desires to be in communion with us, His children, and nothing should come in the way of this. Sometimes we get so focused on outward things, ministry, school, work, friends, that we forget the God who created us is madly in love with us and desires to spend time with us.

I know I fall into this same trap. I want to go and do things all day long. When the day ends I may feel a certain satisfaction looking at all I have accomplished, but my Father is wishing I had taken time with Him.

Whether we know it or not, our hearts long to be with God. We NEED His affection, His touch, and His words. But too often we strive to gain affirmation from people and a sense of accomplishment and we miss out on the only thing which really matters.

I believe God spoke two things to me through my conversation with my friend this week. The first is to remember my relationship with Jesus is the most important thing in my life. Nothing else even comes close.

The second is when I meet one of those ministers who has been constantly pouring out, to be someone who helps bring them rest. My prayer is that God will enable me to be a friend who brings refreshment to the others.

No matter what you do. Whether you are in full time ministry, or work a full time secular job, I encourage you this week to take time out and “gaze upon the beauty of the Lord,” as Psalms 27:4 tells us to. Spend time with the one who created you, died for you, and is dying to be with you. This is His desire for us more than anything else.